Top Ten Reasons the “Bluntees” Need to Dump Original Name in Favor of the “Bluntniks”

By: Steve Thames, Co-editor of the Blunt (1976)

Editor’s note: Per the request of the contributor, this article was updated to reflect a more final version than what ran in print and online. As this piece was a part of the collection of articles gathered by The Blunt writers, The Point decided to update the article to reflect what the author intended to publish.  

  1. “Bluntees” is too passive sounding—like “parolees.”  We were a lot of things; passive wasn’t one of them!
  1. “Bluntniks” sounds cooler.  Duh.
  1.  Speaking of sounding cool, people might even think we’re connected with Stevie Nicks.
  1. “Bluntniks” hearkens back to the “beatniks” — the ‘50s social movement known for its non-conformity to social norms, expressed through all forms of art and literature. 
  1.  And let’s face it, we are a heck of a lot closer in age to the ‘50s than we are to 2024!
  1. “Bluntnik” practically rhymes with “Sputnik,” like us, something that really did its best work while in outer space. (If you don’t know what Sputnik is, ask your world civilization professor; better yet, just get a refund from your world civilization professor.) 
  1. “Bluntnik” just sounds more RUSSIAN. You can’t get more unpopular than that at PLNU these days. Well, unless you’re a gay Russian. 
  1. The name “Bluntees” was never even put to a vote (kind of like those old dorm rules from the ‘70s), which, now that I think about it, is very Russian. 
  1. “Wait.  Can we revisit the name, ‘parolees?’  I’m starting to like the sound of that. Plus that resonates better with my record.”  — Anonymous Bluntnik
  2. Shut it! No!!  That’s exactly the most compelling reason: “Bluntniks” puts to rest forever all our other nicknames — bluntos, bluntards, etc. — and best of all retains the indispensable “BLUNT” title, which was only partly selected because it was the antonym of The POINT…